How are you showing up in the world today?
Intermittently, like misting rain?
Softly retreating, sun in the clouds?
Do you show up with anger,
and is it even the time?
Do you show up at all?
Do you show up when
you hear the call?
For others?
For yourself?
Come through,
clear and consistent,
be seen.
Be where you are.
It beats being
nowhere at all.
I don't know when she thrashed her last
or gasped in recognition
the end had come,
or even if she did,
but she is gone.
I know the dirt thrown over
her is
fertile,
because I am here
and I grow.
I will try to
remember her with gentleness,
for she was also
me.
Anxiety starts with "what ifs"--
but dreams start with "what if," too.
and how you end that sentence
is entirely up to you.
What if things were better?
What if they already were good--
what if you started off grateful,
and the universe understood?
What if your prayer was preparation
and your mind could do the rest?
What if you woke up each day
knowing you were blessed?
What if you were fully present
and finally awake?
Maybe that's all you need
and all that it would take.
I had been on fire
and still smoke in places
a haze drifting around me
and that unmistakable scent.
Parts of me are ashes
and I don't care
where they went.
Not traumatized--
cauterized.
The bleeding stopped.
The past is a scar,
tough but fading.
We are
not wrecks,
but what escaped them.
