Still (Vixen's Den)

My heart, for once, perfectly still,

The ceiling close, and I can feel

The thing I nearly want-

But after stillness, pain,

Life refuses to yield

To will, and I'm no longer still.

I feel the love song bleeding out

Through numb fingers

That shake. Shaking-I can not be still,

And electricity finds my arms and legs,

Hurting me as I rise,

And search the room,

Eyes stinging with tears,

My throat fills with something

Sweet, so sweet I need it out,

And I race, then,

Aching, aching, until

I can let it go-release it.

Then my heart truly beats, and I

Feel disgust.

Sometimes I feel that still.